This, besides being a comedic gold mine the likes of which bash.org can only gape at in awe, is also a reminder that Whir should probably make his archives pages spiffier and get them to, say, match the rest of his site.

Now, off to see about some deer cavortation.

[edit - Placing a copy here for great justice]

Whir: This one kid thinks that he has the answers for a utopian society, and that "old farts" like me are just ruining it because we don't care about the younger generation.

Whir: One of his ideas, mind you, includes printing fake "real" money and ruining the value of the dollar so that people realize that money is evil.

Whir: I've been having fun with that one, although not today.

Dwip: Well, at least that's sort of original.

Whir: Yeah. I guess he really hadn't thought about the whole prison thing.

Dwip: And yeah, you're getting to be positively ancient. I mean, you'll be thirty in under half a decade! You're practically dead by then!

Whir: I might as well be. I'm not exactly thrilled at the prospect.

Dwip: Well, you see, once money is evil, our utopian society will no longer need prisons, because we will all lose our greed and selfishness. Also, we will cavort with deer.

Whir: [Halor] Mael, if the people wants free food and have a plan to do it, but part time, and then someone comes along and wants to invent and perfect rocket science all the time, he/she does so by making money off his research and buying food/anything he needs to survive and live comfortably, what does it mean?

Whir: Can you make heads or tails of that?

Whir: You get blogged!

Dwip: I have no fucking clue. Like, I think he was trying to suggest that the food makers are SOL, but...

Since, in reality, free food isn't happening, it's besides the point, but.

Whir: Yeah, he's trying to explain it, but it's not getting anywhere.

Dwip: Woot.

Whir: [Halor] Pengu, the people asks this rocket scientist to help with growing food to make it free, then this rocket scientist decides to use money he somewhat earns from doing research and buys food from them instead which doesn't make food free

* Whir falls off his chair laughing.

Dwip: Like...yeah. I'm not even sure what to say to that, really.

Whir: Exactly.

Whir: His whole idea is to make everything free by being a big co-op. Um, that's called communism the last time I checked.

Dwip: Yeah, pretty much.

Dwip: Ask him how his experiences in the USSR went. [shrug]

Whir: Heh.

Whir: He's like 15.

Dwip: Nevertheless. Dumbassery is still dumbassery.

Whir: Indeed.

Whir: [Pengu-San] replicator == only way socialism can work

Whir: Heh.

Dwip: Note to self: Try to keep Cadbury filling out of facial hair.

Dwip: And eventually the clones will begin competing for who gets to use the blanket.

Whir: [Halor] also might i add, there is a voting option not to have an elected leader on the leadership ballot

Whir: He was talking about food replicators, actually.

Dwip: Well, ok. Can't argue with that. Well, as long as I get my cold fusion and my teleporters, too.

FTL travel would be nice, too, while we're there.

Whir: [Halor] don't you guys find it weird that the President never fails to be elected?

Dwip: So, what. He wants Powell to lead a military coup to become leader of the country? I'm confused.

Whir: Oooh. He's naive enough to believe that the US is actually a democracy!!

Dwip: Or is he talking about 2 term presidents, in which case George Bush Sr, Carter, and Ford, to go back a bit.

Whir: No, he wants the option of being able to not elect a president, or to change the system of government.

Dwip: Oh, ok.

"So, for the next four years, we're going to use the German constitution. Right then."

Whir: Or something.

Dwip: Or, you know, let's just give government a miss for a while. Give anarchy a try. Because it's worked SO well in the past.

Whir: Yeah.

Dwip: This is dense, even for 15.

Whir: He's pretty idealistic. He's got a lot of passion though. Even if he isn't the brightest bulb in the attic.

Dwip: Ah, so he's the guy that dies tragically at some point during the Revolution.

Whir: Yeah, more or less.

Dwip: Hence providing a martyr for the cause. And conveniently allowing the power-hungry leader type to take over.

Whir: I even said something to the fact that being a martyr for his singular cause isn't going to get him weepers at his funeral.

Whir: [Halor] Mael, how do you know you deserve anything in life?
[Halor] Mael, or that doesn't matter to you?
[Mael] Halor, I deserve what I work for. Is that a bizarre notion?
[Halor] Mael, but in return from your work, what do you get?
[Mael] Halor, I get money, or in the case of my garden, food.
[Mael] Obviously your reward depends on what area you're investing into.
[Halor] Mael, but money can buy other people's work, how is that justified?
[Mael] Um. Because that money is what gets the other people money?
[Mael] Thus creating a functioning economy.
[Halor] Mael, you get money from work, but how do you justify the x amount?

Whir: I love how he can't keep a topic for more than two seconds.

Dwip: I sort of see where he's going. His attempt at Socratic method is a bit odd, but.

It's a fair enough question, I guess, which is why we have a market-driven economy in the first place.

Dwip: Besides. Who wants to work on barter?

Whir: The thing is, I already had the x money argument with him the other night, and since he didn't like my answer, he says it's irrelevant and asks me again.

Dwip: Well, that's just being dense, then.

Whir: Yeah.

Whir: Apparently "you will get payed what you're willing to work for" is too abstract an idea for him.

Whir: And he somehow tried to create a money is evil argument around it, but failed quite miserably.

Dwip: I'm interested to know what medium of exchange he's going to substitute for it.

Whir: None.

Whir: No money.

Whir: Everyone does work, everyone gets a share.

Whir: Communism, plain and simple.

Whir: [Halor] Now is a time i wish i was retarded or stupid because i am living a lie and i know it is a lie
[Mael] You're in the Matrix!

Dwip: So we're going to haul our work chits to the commissar, and he'll be like "Ok, here's your cow."

So, you know, money.

Oh, wait. I forgot. No need for work chits, because nobody would ever steal. So we'll just leave piles of Rolexes and stuff around. Not to mention cows.

Dwip: That's funny on so many levels.

Whir: ROFL

Whir: [Halor] i chose to look for the truth of the matter

[Mael] You think that's air you're breathing?

Dwip: If he's breathing nitrous where he lives, I'm moving.

Whir: And I mention something earlier about this tribe in Africa that does wealth and status by the number of yams they have...

Whir: So this is like 30 minutes later now...

Whir: And Pengu goes "does the red pill taste like yams?"

Whir: I about died.

Dwip: [laugh]

Whir: Bah. He must have passed out. No more laughing at idiocy.

Dwip: Dammit. I was about to demand more moronic entertainment.

Whir: Yeah, sorry. He seems to have fled for fairyland.

Whir: Oh, he's back.

Dwip: Yay! Make him entertain us.

Dwip: Ah.

Whir: I'll try.

Whir: [Mael] So, am I contributing to the decline of modern civilization by paying for my food instead of growing it myself, is that what you're saying?
[Mael] BTW, my garden is furious at your implication that I don't use it.

Whir: Too bad you're so stubborn about new technology. We could have a lot of fun in here.

Dwip: Heh. Likely.

Whir: [Halor] Mael, what you need to do is disect every word you have just written and trace back it's manifestations

Whir: I guess he's run out of steam.

Dwip: Apparently so.

That's funny, though.

And apparently OR has a chemical weapons depot. My National Guard can TOTALLY beat up Marechal's National Guard now!

Whir: Hahahahah.

Whir: [Halor] Mael, not exactly, i am researching everything very thoroughly and then push it when i am about to die

Dwip: Say WHAT?

Whir: Yeah.

Whir: [Mael] What the hell good does that do you or anyone in your generation?

Whir: [Halor] instead of what einstein probably did was argue and revise his arguements, i'm going to just keep everything to myself and be selfish, then throw it all out in an essay before i die

Dwip: And pass utterly into irrelevancy. Sounds cool to me.

Whir: This one is good too...

Whir: [Halor] Mael, first off, do you know why young people do not respect their elders?

Whir: [Halor] Mael, when you figure it out, let me know, because i already do

Whir: Keep in mind, he's 15.

Dwip: Oh yeah. This should be good.

Whir: [Halor] Fierce, it is because people younger than you are going to live longer than you, it doesn't matter how stupid you think they are

* Whir dies.

Dwip: Amusing, yet...wow.

Whir: Yeah.

Whir: We're trying to get him to understand that you can't make an argument without a point.

Dwip: I think he's got what he thinks is a point, just he refuses to share it with the rest of you, because it's too good to share with anyone else unless he's dead or cavorting with deer.

Whir: Heh.

Whir: Haha, now he's just ignoring me because I blasted all his lack of arguments out of the water with common sense.

Whir: Or at least by pointing out he had no point to begin with.

Dwip: Heh.

Whir: He's really holding on to this "younger people don't respect older people because they know they will live longer" thing.

Dwip: Yeah. That's totally why I never did things my parents told me to. As opposed to "But it's just not FAIR!"

Whir: Yeah.

Whir: [Halor] if you start respecting elders by their intelligence or whatever, they will take advantage of you with it

Whir: At least that statement has finally cleared up all the fuckedupedness of the past hour of pointless arguing.

Dwip: Does explain some things, doesn't it?

Dwip: I wonder how much he gets savagely beaten in school.

Whir: [Halor] and after the young knows what the old did, the young is going to want to shove this old fart over a cliff

Whir: [Halor] Mael, they took away your childhood and replaced it with an education

* Whir dies again.

Dwip: This whole conversation deserves to be quoted at length somewhere.

Holy fuck.

Dwip: I mean, high school was disillusioning for me, too, but...

Whir: [Halor] Mael, you were forced to spend your time at school and your parents at work

Whir: [Halor] Mael, ok, If i demanded free food, before you were born, what would happen?

Dwip: Did that start somewhere, or did it just sort of appear?

Whir: [Halor] Mael, don't you think your childhood would be different if food was free, then your parents might work less and be with you more until you're old enough to be on your merry way ?

Whir: He finally said something with half a brain in it!!

Dwip: Except how food production is only some miniscule part of the economy. So, yeah. We handwave food production so it's made by our robot slaves and it's free. You've just made it so farm kids can see their parents and cavort with deer and whatever.

Now, on to auto workers.

Whir: Hahah.

Dwip: Then again, since I guess we're handwaving robot slaves, we're all pretty much set at that point.

Whir: You're being much more clever than I am tonight.

Dwip: I just like the cavorting with deer imagery.

Whir: Yeah, that was pretty good. Which is why it got blogged, obviously.

Whir: [Mael] Like I said the last time we had this conversation, capitalism and business control the world. They won't let it happen.
[Hakkuryuu] not to mention the amount of lazy people out there
[Halor] Mael, sorry to say, they don't
[Hakkuryuu] if you don't give incentives peole wouldn't work
[Halor] Mael, they may, MAY, control THIS world
[Hakkuryuu] no work, no production, no economy change
[Mael] There's not "may," business controls the world. That's how it works. By not accepting that reality, you are hamstringing yourself.

Whir: [Halor] Mael, yes there is, Business may control this world, Reality in this world is infinite

Whir: Left field called, they said they were missing a segue, have you seen it?

Whir: [Halor] we're lazy because we're taught to believe in the miracle of science rather than doing agricultural work because money allows us to buy food

Dwip: A) Squirrel aliens.

B) Not to inturrupt the whole divining the mind of Buddha thing, here, but what the HELL did that even mean?

Whir: [Mael] Halor, the miracles of science are what allows agriculture to FEED the world.

Whir: I have no idea. He didn't go any further with the statement.

Dwip: Oh, ok. Scratch the robot slaves, then.

Dwip: That sucks. I was really looking forward to the not having to work part.

Whir: Yeah, me too.

Whir: [Halor] yea, the problem was people decided to learn the science of logic, science of quantum physics and didn't want free food

Whir: What?

Dwip: Oh, ok. God's going to give us the food hookup. Got it.

Whir: I love it...

Whir: [Mael] Okay, Halor, you just levelled NYC. You just made 21 million people homeless so you could build farms. Where are you going to put those people?
[Mael] The crop yield vs pop density doesn't add up.
[Mael] Better yet, level Tokyo.
[Mael] 35 million people in an area smaller than NYC.
[Hakkuryuu] Oi, don't level Tokyo. I'm going there for my holiday
[Fierce] DUDE, NOT TOKYO
[Mael] Don't forget to mention that Japan isn't exactly known for it's massive amount of agricultural property.
[Fierce] WTF ARE YOU CRAZY!?
[Mael] Oh shut up you pansies.

Dwip: Heh.

Whir: What I get for having this argument in an anime channel. :P

Dwip: Aff.

Dwip: So what happened after we leveled NYC and Tokyo?

Whir: Nothing. He said they would all live with me.

Dwip: A Fight Club-esque rambling speech about pounding corn on the abandoned interstates?

Dwip: I see. You have the mythical Garden Of Free Food, I see.

Whir: I guess.

Whir: And everfull pitcher and horn of plenty.

Dwip: I wonder what he thinks of Fight Club. I bet he wants to be Tyler Durden.

Dwip: Oh. Suddenly it makes sense. He plays too much D&D! Ok.

Whir: Hah!

Dwip: So probably he cavorts with those midget deer from FR.

Whir: This is good too:

Whir: [Halor] i thank my teachers for letting me fulfill my dream of making a utopian society
[Hakkuryuu] And I'll thank my money for sparing me of farming

[Halor] Mael, there probably will be but less than now but probably more quality to the overall anime and internet

[Mael] Who the hell wants quality internet? All I care about is downloading anime and porn.

[Halor] Hak, and i do not thank you for ruining other people's lives with your money

Whir: Notice both sides of the conversation hold various amounts of amusement.

Dwip: Very.

Whir: Now we're back to "how do you know what amount of money you should make for the work you do?" thing.

Dwip: Because, based on market conditions, it is percieved to be worth X?

Whir: Yeah.

Whir: My go is you're worth what you're willing to work for.

Dwip: Or some balance between that and what people are willing to offer.

Whir: Argh. You need to be here for shit like that.

Whir: Er, this.

Dwip: Yeah?

Whir: It would be a lot more entertaining.

Dwip: Because the masses need to hear about cavorting with deer?

Whir: Well, that, and you make points based on facts and history whereas I make points based on common sense.

Dwip: Both work pretty well, usually.

Whir: Yeah.

Whir: But it's more fun when everyone is present.

Dwip: [grin]

Whir: It would be great fun to get a chat room going with like, Cole and Marechal some night.

Dwip: True.

Whir: See, I'm answering with my "common sense" and he wants fucking math problems. Yeesh.

Dwip: Like what?

Whir: He wants an absolute number for how much you should earn for x amount of work.

Dwip: Oh. Good luck with that one.

Whir: Yeah, I'm not talking to him anymore.

Whir: At least not right now.

Dwip: Hrm. I really want to go to bed. But I'm not in the least tired.

Whir: Wow, he's getting REALLY specific now.

Whir: [Halor] Hak, lets say you get paid to pick up a littered paper bag, how much do you earn?

Dwip: Hopefully I would do that out of the goodness of my heart. Not a lot of people get paid for that sort of shit.

Whir: Yeah. He's just getting absurd.

Dwip: I bet he thinks he's being clever, too.

The anti-educational cynical posing sort of made that clear.

In a rather breathtaking fashion, no less.

Whir: Yeah, he does, look.

Whir: [Halor] Mael, do you really want me to disect everything and make yo look like a fool?
[Mael] Yay, we have now gone in a giant circle and still not found a solid point!
[Hakkuryuu] And right now, my economy here is pretty predicatble and stable, so ask any rubbish picker, they can tell you their wages re about 800 per month
[Mael] Yes, Halor, please do.
[Halor] Mael, nah, i'm too smart for that
[Mael] Hahahahahah.
[Mael] Yet you do nothing to prove it.
[Halor] i already did

Dwip: Awesome.

Dwip: The awesome thing about the internet is, ten or twenty or whatever years from now, people like us can look up people like him and say "Look. You're STILL a dumbass."

Whir: Yeah.

Dwip: I really like the whole neo-communist dark ages society he's got set up. In another life, he'd have made a great khmer rouge.

Whir: ROFL

Whir: [Halor] so the price of these tree depends on demand for tree and supply of trees?
[Hakkuryuu] YES

[Halor] that doesn't make sense

* Whir dies, yet again.

Dwip: With the whole "Down with the bourgoisie exploitation of the common worker! Abolish the classes! Destroy the intelligentsia who keep us down!"

So, you know, he'll grow up and kill a few million Cambodians or something. He can be JUST LIKE Pol Pot.

Dwip: OMG. Hurting. Hurting. The pain.

Dwip: [still laughing]

Whir: You should see this shit.

Dwip: You need to keep quoting it at me.

Whir: Now he's asserting that since he doesn't know the value of a tree, it could be $1 or a million.

Whir: [Halor] ok, demand and supply, cost of tree should be what people are willing to pay
[Hakkuryuu] yes.
[Halor] who owns tree? i own it by force and by government( doesn't make sense)

Dwip: Presumably they still teach econ in high school these days. Boy is that going to be a shock.

Dwip: Oh dear.

Dwip: I wonder how much class this kid sleeps through.

Whir: Well, I don't think he's American.

Dwip: I gathered. Nevertheless.

Whir: Oh. I'm wrong, he's from California.

Whir: Not that that's any better.

Dwip: My thoughts exactly.

Whir: [Halor] these elders are the ones who screwed up this world before i was born
[Mael] Whoah whoah whoah.
[Mael] You're blaming the world on ME?
[Halor] Mael, partly, if you can call it that
[astare_ae] Mael = All mighty screwer upperer elder....
[Mael] I guess I am!
[Mael] In under 30 years, I've managed to destroy the world for Halor. I am fucking impressed with myself!!
[Halor] Mael, no, you did more than that, you made it possible for me to become famous by making a utopian world

Dwip: Awesome. You've become the harbinger of the Messiah. How's that feel?

Whir: Pretty fucking good, truth be told.

Dwip: Heh.

Whir: As I'm sitting here thinking "damn, this CD is long," and then realize WinAmp is on repeat.

Dwip: Haha.

Whir: [Halor] if i wasn't born yet into this money world, and this elderly guy have , i feel sorry for this elderly guy when i am born and realize money is an illusion

Dwip: Well, he's half right.

Whir: Yeah, but his grammar is all wrong.

Whir: So we're giving him shit about that now too. :P

Dwip: He never actually started with world domination, so, you know.

Whir: But still, he hasn't really got a shot at this rate.

Whir: Hah, we've been arguing for like four hours now.

Whir: W. T. FUCK?

Whir: He just said he's in an economics class.

Dwip: !

Whir: [Halor] Men's Health Issues, and Statistics in Business and Economics
[Kuran] o.o
[nightmarik] ...Men's Health Issues is a subject now in school???? LMAO
[nightmarik] and you should be studying more than that?
[Hakkuryuu] THEN WHY DONT YOU UNDERSTAND WHENEVER MAEL OR I TELL YOU ABOUT ECONOMICS?
[Mael] I was just wondering that myself.
[Hakkuryuu] lol
[Halor] Hak, i do, you don't

Dwip: We've been reduced to "I understand everything! You understand nothing!" as an argument technique.

I'm running my house off the power generated by Pol Pot spinning in his grave.

Whir: Hahah.

Dwip: I'm rendered almost speechless.

Whir: [Halor] if i believe in money, and i am either looked upon as having x amount of money, then i look at the world and i feel sad about it, there isn't free food, nothing is free
[Halor] then what use is continuing believing in money?
[Hakkuryuu] if you want to live a good life, you'll use money and you'll believe in it.
[nightmarik] your labelling money as the cause
[Mael] Well, mostly because not believing in money is going to find you starving to death in a ditch, I'd guess.

Dwip: I like how he keeps coming back to free food.

Whir: Yeah. He's huge on this free food thing.

Dwip: It's kind of confusing, really.

Whir: Yeah.

Whir: I'm doing something else now.

Dwip: I really want to know what he said to the starving in a ditch thing.

Whir: He didn't. :(

Dwip: Bah.

Dwip: I suppose I shall go to bed, then.

We're on a roll today.

--------------------------

Quoth Whir: We need to have an entire website dedicated to Marechal conversations.

--------------------------

Me: Napoleon lost, though.

Besides, he completely subverted the Revolution.

Which isn't to say that the Revolution didn't need subverting, but when the whole goal of the thing is to ESCAPE monarchy, well.

But it's, you know, the French. Can't do anything right.

Marechal: Napoleon abolished the monarchy!

Me: Yeah, you could sort of say he did. Except then he set himself up, which sort of, you know, defeats the purpose.

Marechal: As Emperor.

Me: Because, you know, changing the name makes your dictatorship that much better than other, wannabe dictatorships.

Me: Whir: Ask him how he feels about giant airships, steam-powered muskets, and chivalry.

Marechal: Bah

Me: Bah to the combo of steam powered airships/muskets and chivalry, or were you conceding the point that Napoleon subverted the Revolution in a completely unacceptable manner?

Marechal: None. Napoleon saved the Revolution by ending it.

Me: Granted that the whole Reign of Terror business wasn't exactly a bastion of Goodness, Light, and the Warm Fuzzy Feeling, but, well, you know. Setting yourself up as Emperor is such a good expression of liberty, equality, and fraternity.

*some 10 minutes pass*

Me: I see you are completely unable to respond to my devastating verbal riposte.

Marechal: In order to save the benefits of the Revolution from the clutching arms of the royalists, the monarchists, the RCC, the other European powers, communists, and infidels, Napoleon had to centralize the government in France in the person of himself as Emperor in order to safeguard the nation from the enemies within and without.

Me: So he was a lot like Hitler, then, is what you're saying.

Marechal: Except Hitler was a bad man.

Me: Well, you know. Take away the anti-Semitism and all, and add in a maniacal desire to conquer the world, starting with Russia.

Oh wait.

Marechal: Napoleon was about the only Emperor the Jews ever did well with for the record. Napoleon=hero of the Jews.

And Napoleon didn't have the whole genocide thing going on. He liked to play with little kids. =D

Me: Just like Michael Jackson!

Radio, radio...

So, for today's exciting Driving In Cars story, they're ripping up Highway 99 through Monroe, and due to the ludicrousness of their flagger placement and the incomprehensible signals I was being flashed, I almost got run over by a semi. That was fun. I have since resolved that Kyle and Alpine Roads will be my friends. Screw you, ODOT. We don't need your stinking traffic light anyway.

Anyway. So I was musing about the current state of radio today, and I came up with a few things radio stations ought to pay some attention to. They won't, but they can't say I didn't warn them.

1) I don't care what your morning or afternoon or whatever show is, it's not funny. It sucks. We tune into your station to hear you play music. Not to listen to a couple of juvinile dumbasses make fools of themselves.

2) If you've been playing the song for 3 months, you no longer get to say "And now, new music by...!" It's stupid.

3) This goes double for that Mudvane song or whoever they are. Not that it ever started cool, but it's really annoying now. I honestly do not feel the need to hear it every thirty minutes on three different stations, sometimes at the same time, any more.

4) And while I, like many others, do in fact like Metallica and Nirvana, I A), like to hear other bands, too, and B) like to hear different songs than, you know, All Apologies and Fade To Black. Also, I like other Rage songs besides Bulls on Parade.

5) While I admire the dedication it takes to have every station in the state schedule their commercial breaks at exactly the same time in an attempt to draw me into a credit-fueled buying spree, you should be aware that, not only do I have a CD changer for these times, you need way better commercials.

6) I'm not sure what went wrong in the last five years, but somewhere between 2000 and now, every playlist on every oldies station everywhere started playing random crap and sucking. Fix that.

7) Let me reiterate point 1 again. Your show...sucks. Your DJ...isn't funny. Shut the hell up and play something. We're all happier that way.

Just saying.

As it happens, yesterday was a fabulous day. Bright sunshine, warm, perfect day to blare music and drive down the road a lot, which is what I ended up doing.

This was prefaced by an excellent weekend wherein the parental types left for the coast, and I had the house to myself for three days, which as you can imagine was just fine by me.

I also watched the remade Manchurian Candidate, which was exceedingly cool in a very creepy way. Kind of reminded me of Fight Club, in a way. I shall now need to acquire and watch the original.

I also read all the way through Watership Down, which although it contained no actual rabbits in space*, was pretty cool. Would've been even better had I read it when I was 10, but oh well. I want to read The Mouse and the Motorcycle again now. And The Indian in the Cupboard. The Indian in the Cupboard was about the coolest book ever. I've got all sorts of neat plastic stuff I'd like to make real.

Obviously all the work I've been doing in children's check-in at the library has been bringing back memories of my long-repressed childhood, or something. Hopefully it doesn't turn out that I was brainwashed by squirrel aliens during the Gulf War or something.

* - For those of you who went "What the HELL?" which I assume is most of you, consider two things. 1) Spacefaring water-carrying ships in the Battletech universe; 2) Blackhawk Down. Probably they're saving the animal tactical combat book for after the squirrel alien takeover, though.

(Because we all remember our Megatokyo, right?)

While I recognize that most of you will have no freaking clue what I'm talking about, I find it heartily amusing that, no matter how much Liao or Jade Falcon I play in MWDA, I never seem to win with them, yet the instant I go back to my Spirit Cat light mech roots, I suddenly kick ass all over the place.

Yes, in a total triumph of old school I've-had-these-pieces-since-I-first-started-playing-two-years-ago pieces, Kym Nova Cat, Malisa Nova Cat, a Locust, of all things, and a Panther pretty much totally cleaned up in our multiplayer lance battles last night. Huzzah. Newest piece there was the Panther, from the last set. Newest piece before that? The Locust, which came out in, you know, summer 2003 or so.

Too, the dual Spirit Cat Uziel (gaze upon the leetness of the sculpt!) with Nova Cat Star Captains and a Spirit Cat Mongoose with Evade and a Targeting Computer seems to be working out astonishingly well. I've taken second like, what, twice now?

There's a Nova Cat 'mech coming in the mail for me.

I know you don't care. I'll shut up now.

Me: You know, craving cherry-flavored cough syrup is a bit strange.

Whir: Um. You're sick. See a head shrinker.

Me: Well, I don't think it was the cough syrup so much as the artificial cherry flavoring.

Whir: I stand by my original statement.

Me: What's wrong with artificial cherry flavoring?

Whir: You're not right in the head.

Me: So you're a blasphemer against artificial cherry flavoring.

Whir: No, you're a heathen who likes it.

Me: Ok, so what do you get on snow cones then?

Whir: The blue stuff.

Me: WTH is blue?

Whir: Usually raspberry.

Me: Nononono. The true flavors for snow cones are cherry or root beer. Maybe bubble gum, but that's more properly applied to the Baskin Robbin's ice cream flavor.

Whir: Bubble gum? That's horrible. Root beer would be good.

Me: Root beer isn't just good, it's fucking awesome.

Bubble gum, as I said, is better as an ice cream flavor at Baskin Robbin's. Along with, you know, mint chocolate chip, peppermint, and vanilla.

Whir: I don't care what anyone says, vanilla is the One True Flavor.

Me: I'm a big fan, actually. Chocolate people are heretics. In fact, chocolate is one giant heresy.

Whir: Good man.

Me: And I don't care about what every female in the world says about it, either. Unless you've backed up your chocolate with either Cadbury egg filling, caramel, or peanut butter, you are a heretic.

So, you know, here I am. Highway 99, middle of nowhere, coming home after a reasonably lengthy day. Looking forward to some food.

*BANG!*

Whoops, that didn't sound so great. Wonder what it was...

*bumpbumpbumpbumpbump*

Oh hell. I've got a flat. Doesn't that just suck. So I pull over, which is no small accomplishment, considering that the shoulder of 99 is just about wide enough to ride a bike on, if you've got small tires and don't mind the 2 foot drop if you slip. Turned out my right rear tire had a fairly nice gash in the side, which pretty much killed any chance of making it very far. Too, attempting to change it for the spare right then and there had the chance of sucking quite a lot. But then I remembered: I'm almost to Greenberry! So I leap back in the car and hobble down to Greenberry at 35mph.

Now, you have to understand that Greenberry is not, shall we say, a central hub of Western Civilization. You've got the store/tavern, and you've got a couple houses, and that's what you've got. But you've also got a parking lot, and rain or no, vast mud puddles reminiscent of the vast uncharted reaches of the Pacific or no, it's flat.

So I've got this flat tire. And, while I have the tools and the spare to change the tire, it just so happened that I had never actually done the changing of a tire, which is one of those things that I had sort of faintly worried about for a few years, but always put off in favor of doing more gaming or something. And rightly so. Changing a tire isn't too tough, although you'd think they could've designed a jack with a slightly better crank. Like, you know, one that actually worked.

To make a long story short, I got to limp along at 35mph on my spare back to Monroe, which took far more time than it should have, and I had to restrain myself from going 65, which was really the worst part of the whole experience.

Now, what I should have done is gone right back to Corvallis and taken care of business, but being not that wise, I went back to Monroe, slept, then went the 5 miles into Junction City the next day, on the theory that they were nice and close. Only to have the tire guy tell me that actually, for some reason my model Escort has bizzare tire sizes, and they didn't have any, but Corvallis did. Life, it seems, has a sense of humor.

Not that recognizing that made driving on my spare into Corvallis any more fun. At least I found out that getting up to 55 wouldn't kill me, but the whole spare-tire-is-inch-shorter-than-real-tires thing kind of sucked, and involved a lot of wobbling. This is not so fun as it may sound.

Less fun than that is getting to the tire place in Corvallis, having them do my tires, and having my bank account give me insufficient funds errors. Because, of course, I had enough money to soak a $300 tire replacement on all my tires, but not do that AND buy plane tickets to PA. So I got to do the credit thing. Oh joy of joys.

Whereupon I proceeded to get back on 99 and go very very fast. Because I could.

But at least those were the original tires that went. 6 years of service isn't bad.

And then, on a totally different note, we have the weekend. Friday, having dealt with the evils of tire replacement, I immediately got to turn around and go back to Corvallis, because in my wisdom I am now GMing a Battletech RPG campaign at the shop. But I get home, and I see this email, and it's from Tali, essentially saying "So what time are you coming tomorrow?"

We pause. "But the email said the weekend after this one, and besides you got the date for Saturday wrong anyway."

"So I can't type. We know this. You're still coming, right?"

Insert a lengthy night of RPG stuff involving character creation and more pop than has been drunk in quite a while, followed by 6-7 hours of sleep and a drive to Portland. Which I drove at high rates of speed, because I could. And then there was a lot of touring Portland, and a trip to Powell's, which as we all know is just about as big as single bookstores get, and it had many books that I desired, so I purchased these books. Also, there was a lot of getting in Tali's car and saying "Ah, new car smell!" because I like new car smell, and Tali's car is, well, new. And very neat.

And then I drove back down I-5 at high rates of speed, because I could.

Oh boy did I butcher THAT song title.

Anyway. Since previous bloggage has fallen off the page, I guess I should say something. Not that anybody said anything to the last post. Since most of what I've done lately has been Mechwarrior/Battletech related (I ran BT for 8 hours straight at a local game con last weekend!), I guess I'll settle for a tiny other bit of news.

I'm going to go see Regina in May, and she's taking me to go see U2.

Yeah, that's pretty freaking awesome, to say the least.

bash.org: i think in the whole sense of the "information superhighway", my isp ended up driving a yugo down some dirt road
Me: "Monroetel lives!"
Clyos: "cept ours is a 80s Trans Am on cinder blocks, it doesn't move"